FAIR LAUNCH ON SOLANA · 100% CRIME
STEAL A BRAINROT — $BRAINROT
Mamma mia, that’s-a MY brainrot now.
The full game, live in your browser — 76 brainrots, free to play, no wallet needed.
NOW PLAYABLE IN FIRST PERSON · 3D BETAFair launch on pump.fun. No presale, no tax, no mercy.
SURVEILLANCE FOOTAGE
SEE THE CRIME
Thirty-eight seconds of evidence, recovered from the scene. The game she is real — judge for yourself.
exhibit 67/67 — the heist, as she happened
HOW THE GAME WORKS
IL COLPO
Four steps. Zero permits. The perfect crime, explained for the famiglia.
- 1
COMPRA
The red carpet rolls, the brainrots arrive. You buy one before some other ladro does. Simple, no?
- 2
SI STAMPA
Now he prints the money. Every second, the cash she comes out. He does nothing else. Bellissimo.
- 3
RUBA
Their lock she sleeps? You walk in molto quiet, tung tung tung, and take what is yours. (It was not yours. It was a real player's.)
RUBATO - 4
RICCO O RUBATO
Get rich, or get robbed-o. There is no third option, amico. È il mercato libero, capisci.
And deeper in the dossier: 12 mutations, the fuse machine, 18 rebirths, the lava hour, and raids on the bases of real players. Your empire follows your wallet — la famiglia does the cloud saves, capisci.
THE LINEUP
THE BRAINROTS
75 suspects in the file, dagli OG fino al common. The worst 12 are on the board — declassify the rest yourself.
Spyder Elephant
OG+$60M/s
costa $10B
The unstealable one. Allegedly.
Headless Horseman
OG+$35M/s
costa $6.0B
He lost his head. He kept the lantern.
Meowl
OG+$24M/s
costa $4.0B
Half cat, half owl, all judgment.
Skibidi Toilet
OG+$18M/s
costa $3.0B
The one that started everything.
Strawberry Elephant
OG+$12M/s
costa $2.0B
La fragola suprema. Bow.
John Pork
OG+$6.0M/s
costa $1.0B
He is calling. You will answer.
???67
Secret+$3.3M/s
costa $550M
???Graipuss Medussi
Secret+$3.0M/s
costa $500M
???Bisonte Giuppitere
Secret+$2.8M/s
costa $480M
???La Grande Combinasion
Secret+$2.6M/s
costa $450M
???Chimpanzini Spiderini
Secret+$2.3M/s
costa $400M
???Pot Hotspot
Secret+$2.2M/s
costa $380M
DECLASSIFY THE OTHER 63 SUSPECTSCHIUDI THE FILE — basta
???Las Tralaleritas
Secret+$2.0M/s
costa $350M
???Chicleteira Bicicleteira
Secret+$1.9M/s
costa $320M
???Nuclearo Dinossauro
Secret+$1.8M/s
costa $300M
???Torrtuginni Dragonfrutini
Secret+$1.7M/s
costa $280M
???Esok Sekolah
Secret+$1.5M/s
costa $250M
???Sammyni Spyderini
Secret+$1.2M/s
costa $200M
???Los Combinasionas
Secret+$900K/s
costa $150M
???Dragon Cannelloni
Secret+$600K/s
costa $100M
???Agarrini la Palini
Secret+$425K/s
costa $80M
???Garama and Madundung
Secret+$300K/s
costa $50M
???Tung Tung Tung Sahur
Secret+$150K/s
costa $25M
???Los Tralaleritos
Secret+$95K/s
costa $16M
???La Vacca Saturno Saturnita
Secret+$60K/s
costa $10M
Ballerino Lololo
Brainrot God+$50K/s
costa $9.0M
He dances so the candle never goes out.
Los Crocodillitos
Brainrot God+$48K/s
costa $8.5M
Baby bombers in formation.
Trippi Troppi Troppa Trippa
Brainrot God+$45K/s
costa $8.0M
The shrimp lifted. The shrimp grew.
Espresso Signora
Brainrot God+$40K/s
costa $7.0M
One sip and the deal is closed.
Trenostruzzo Turbo 3000
Brainrot God+$35K/s
costa $6.5M
Departs on time. Arrives at terminal velocity.
Orcalero Orcala
Brainrot God+$30K/s
costa $5.5M
The orca that knows the ritual.
Pakrahmatmamat
Brainrot God+$28K/s
costa $5.0M
He has seen things. Tung-adjacent things.
Girafa Celestre
Brainrot God+$25K/s
costa $4.5M
Her head is in the cosmos, literally.
Tralalita Tralala
Brainrot God+$22K/s
costa $4.0M
La signora shark. Respect her.
Odin Din Din Dun
Brainrot God+$18K/s
costa $3.2M
Arancia at the gym since 1987.
Cocofanto Elefanto
Brainrot God+$17K/s
costa $3.0M
Coconut armor, elefante heart.
Matteo
Brainrot God+$15K/s
costa $2.5M
Nobody knows what Matteo is.
Tralalero Tralala
Brainrot God+$12K/s
costa $2.0M
Tralalero, tralala — the shark himself, molto censored.
Bombombini Gusini
Mythic+$6.0K/s
costa $1.2M
Bombardiro's brother. The goose with the payload.
Cavallo Virtuoso
Mythic+$4.2K/s
costa $900K
Plays the violin. Wins the derby.
Avocadorilla
Mythic+$3.8K/s
costa $800K
The pit is his heart. Do not touch it.
Rhino Toasterino
Mythic+$3.2K/s
costa $650K
Breakfast has never been this dangerous.
Te Te Te Sahur
Mythic+$3.0K/s
costa $600K
Little cup, big drum, no mercy.
Orangutini Ananassini
Mythic+$2.8K/s
costa $550K
Pineapple chest, primate fists.
Bombardiro Crocodilo
Mythic+$2.5K/s
costa $500K
Air raid siren? No. Worse.
Spioniro Golubiro
Mythic+$2.2K/s
costa $450K
The pigeon sees everything. Reports most of it.
Frigo Camelo
Mythic+$2.0K/s
costa $350K
Cold storage with the long neck.
Lionel Cactuseli
Legendary+$550/s
costa $120K
The GOAT of the desert pitch.
Ballerina Cappuccina
Legendary+$500/s
costa $100K
She spins, the caffè never spills.
Blueberrinni Octopusini
Legendary+$450/s
costa $85K
Eight arms, one berry.
Glorbo Fruttodrillo
Legendary+$400/s
costa $75K
Watermelon crocodillo, very juicy.
Chef Crabracadabra
Legendary+$380/s
costa $70K
The soup is magic. The claws are real.
Chimpanzini Bananini
Legendary+$300/s
costa $50K
Monkey peel-o, very illegal-o.
Sigma Boy
Legendary+$260/s
costa $45K
He does not chase. He attracts.
Burbaloni Luliloli
Legendary+$200/s
costa $35K
Capibara of the sacred coconut.
Bananita Dolphinita
Epic+$150/s
costa $25K
Delfino in the banana, sì sì.
Salamino Penguino
Epic+$135/s
costa $22K
Cured meat. Cold feet.
Brri Brri Bicus Dicus Bombicus
Epic+$115/s
costa $18K
Centurion bird. Veni vidi pecked.
Brr Brr Patapim
Epic+$100/s
costa $15K
His nose-o is molto grande.
Perochello Lemonchello
Epic+$95/s
costa $14K
Parrot of the limoncello. Slightly drunk.
Trulimero Trulicina
Epic+$85/s
costa $12K
Fish with the legs of a man.
Bambini Crostini
Epic+$78/s
costa $11K
Swaddled in toast. Sleeping on carbs.
Cappuccino Assassino
Epic+$75/s
costa $10K
Double espresso, double katana.
Gangster Footera
Rare+$45/s
costa $6.0K
The shoe that runs the streets.
Boneca Ambalabu
Rare+$40/s
costa $5.0K
Frog. Tire. Legs. No questions.
Bandito Bobritto
Rare+$35/s
costa $4.5K
Castoro mafioso. Knows a guy.
Ta Ta Ta Ta Sahur
Rare+$28/s
costa $3.5K
The little drummer of the dawn patrol.
Trippi Troppi
Rare+$15/s
costa $2.0K
Gatto gambero from the cursed sea.
Pipi Kiwi
Common+$13/s
costa $1.5K
Half raccoon, half fruit, all crime.
Talpa Di Fero
Common+$11/s
costa $1.2K
Iron drill nose. Digs straight to profit.
Svinino Bombondino
Common+$9/s
costa $1.0K
Piggy bomb. Handle with amore.
Fluriflura
Common+$7/s
costa $750
Tucano with the gold occhiali.
Tim Cheese
Common+$5/s
costa $500
The mouse with the dirty money.
Lirilì Larilà
Common+$3/s
costa $250
Cactus elefante, always on time-o.
Noobini Pizzanini
Common+$1/s
costa $25
Fresh from the oven, molto noob.
The secrets stay classified until you pull one off the carpet yourself. La famiglia does not do the spoilers.
THE PAPERWORK
$BRAINROT TOKENOMICS
Filed by the carabinieri who gave up. Read the evidence, draw your own conclusioni.
WANTED
$BRAINROT — AT LARGE ON SOLANA
EVIDENCE:
- EXHIBIT A — SUPPLY: 1,000,000,000 $BRAINROT. Every single one accounted for. For now.
- EXHIBIT B — TAX: 0%. The famiglia does not skim. We steal directly, like honest criminals.
- EXHIBIT C — LIQUIDITY: LP burned. The liquidity she sleeps with the fishes. There is no rug — only carpet. Red carpet.
- EXHIBIT D — LAUNCH: Fair launch on pump.fun. No presale, no team bag, no insider-o. Everyone starts equal. Then they rob each other.
report filed by LA FAMIGLIA — case status: molto open
IL PIANO (how to buy)
- 1
GET PHANTOM
Download the Phantom wallet. Is like a normal wallet, but for the crime of the future.
- 2
LOAD THE SOL
Send some SOL from the exchange. This is the getaway fuel, capisci.
- 3
PASTE THE CA
The contract address. Pasted below. Check it twice — la famiglia announced it on the X, nowhere else.
CA:aHiU...pump - 4
SWAP
Press the button on pump.fun. Congratulazioni — you are now famiglia.
PSST. OVER HERE.
IL MERCATO NERO
The back-room shelf. Everything priced in $BRAINROT, everything molto effective, nothing with a receipt.
Server Luck 2x
CONSUMABILE10,000 $BRAINROT
For 10 minutes the carpet leans rarer. A polite bribe.
Cash Bundle
CONSUMABILE10,000 $BRAINROT
An instant bag of cash worth 10 minutes of your income (min $10K). No questions asked.
Server Luck 4x
CONSUMABILE15,000 $BRAINROT
Serious luck. Only sold while 2x is already running — the house has standards.
Coil Combo
PERMANENTE20,000 $BRAINROT
Permanent +35% run speed. Steal fast, tralalero later.
Lucky Block
CONSUMABILE25,000 $BRAINROT
Plants a hatching block on a free pad — Epic or better in 3 minutes. Pazienza.
Server Luck 8x
CONSUMABILE25,000 $BRAINROT
The forbidden luck. Only sold while 4x is running. The saints look away.
Blackhole Slap
PERMANENTE35,000 $BRAINROT
Permanent slap gear. Press SPACE to slap a tripped alarm back into silence.
2x Money
PERMANENTE50,000 $BRAINROT
Permanently doubles every dollar your brainrots produce.
VIP
PERMANENTE75,000 $BRAINROT
Golden name, +15s base lock, +25% income. The server takes care of its own.
Brainrot God Lucky Block
CONSUMABILE80,000 $BRAINROT
A 4-minute hatch for a guaranteed Mythic, Brainrot God — or a Secret.
Secret Lucky Block
CONSUMABILE200,000 $BRAINROT
The forbidden block. 5 minutes to a Brainrot God or a SECRET. Tell no one.
Starter Pack
PERMANENTE30,000 $BRAINROT
One-time bundle: the Coil Combo, $25K cash and a free Lucky Block. Every empire starts somewhere.
LA RUOTA DEL DESTINO
The wheel in the back of the shop. One FREE SPIN every 45 minutes — cash, rare brainrots, mega locks, server luck, and a jackpot that pays in Brainrot Gods. Extra spins: 8,000 $BR, daily deal 4,000 $BR, three-pack 16,000 $BR. The house always wins, except here the house is also you. Capisci.
The black market runs on real $BRAINROT — no free samples, no demo handouts. The shelf opens when the coin drops. Buy in, then spend like a true criminale.
ENTRA NEL MERCATOFAQ
LA FAMIGLIA
The questions everybody asks before they join. Read the case files, then kiss the ring.
CASE FILE N° 001Is this affiliated with Roblox or the original game?
No. This is a fan-made parody, made with love and zero permission requested. Not affiliated with Roblox, with DoBig Studios, or with pump.fun. The brainrots belong to the internet, capisci.
CASE FILE N° 002When CA?
Presto. TBA. The famiglia announces on the X when the moment she is right. Anyone who sends you a CA before then is a scammer — report them to nobody, because there are no carabinieri here.
CASE FILE N° 003Is the stealing legal here?
Sì, molto legale. Inside the game, the stealing is not a crime — it is the entire economy. The blockchain has no carabinieri, and the lock you forgot to renew is a signed confession.
CASE FILE N° 004How does the coin connect to the game?
The black market prices everything in $BRAINROT. No demo handouts — the only way to get $BRAINROT is to buy the real coin at launch. Everything else in the game is free: steal, print, rob, rebirth. The token is just the key to the back room.
Enough reading. Go steal something.
GIOCA — STEAL NOW